Today

This morning, sitting in my yellow car, waiting for my husband to come down, I spied a bird on the tree in front with a twig in its beak. God, even the bloody birds know that the idea is to work hard to build a home, I thought to myself.

Then the twig fell from its beak and it didn’t even look down or give it a second glance. It sat on the branch for a while longer, and then simply flew away.

What the heck kind of lesson is that?
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Today my father-in-law and I cooked mutton together while my husband and his cousin lay splayed in front of the TV.

He cut the meat while I chopped the onions and potatoes. He taught me a neat trick for the garlic – just chop it up and then rub it in your hands like you would peanuts to remove the peel. Much simpler than peeling each clove, keeps your fingers from stinking as well. We chatted about this and that as we worked, and totally forgot the tomatoes which he realized once the oil was hot and the garlic was starting to burn and we had to cut them in a hurry and throw them in. :)

I feel a connection with him since the day he called two weeks ago.

This was when they had just returned from Mumbai, and he told me on the phone how he felt about B. He hadn’t called to complain or any such thing, had just called to say they were back. But then he totally opened up and couldn’t stop and spoke continuously for about fifteen minutes. And I just listened silently and cried because I feel exactly the same way he does. He put my feelings into words – ‘insensitive’, ‘doesn't care', ‘expects us to sacrifice our emotions’, ‘wants us to change our lives around his’…
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I am currently on a very dangerous roller-coaster ride and I am scared of crashing very, very soon.